


maybe

by protectkiho



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Denial of Feelings, Light Angst, M/M, Mild Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-09
Updated: 2018-04-09
Packaged: 2019-04-20 15:46:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14264355
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/protectkiho/pseuds/protectkiho
Summary: Another case of getting drunk and making bad decisions





	maybe

**Author's Note:**

> i didnt proofread again sry i crammed this in like a little over 4 hrs, hope u guys will like it nonetheless + i still dont kno how tenses work

"Hey hyung, I'm sorry. I _know_ I promised you and Hoseok hyung, but I have an emergency meeting to attend and I won't be able to return 'til 2am. So you guys can go on ahead and drink."

Guilt dripped from Changkyun's voice as he apologized over and over through the phone.

"You said you were free today," Kihyun breathed in annoyance, voice slightly raising because it wasn’t the first time that the youngest had ditched them, "but it's not like we can do anything about it- just as when we've finished buying the booze. And we bought a lot too!"

"Yeah, I know. I'm really _really_ sorry; I'll make it up to you I swear. I'm giving you permission to flick my forehead all the way to Jupiter if I back out again next time!" Changkyun managed to let out before ending the call. The youngest always had the knack of inserting witty punchlines into their little arguments.

"I knew it. He won't be able to make it, huh?" Hoseok said as a matter of factly while pouring some of the contents of the cheap leftover whiskey they had from their last hang out into a shot glass.

"The usual student organization meeting," Kihyun sighed as he plopped down on Hoseok's bed and checked the time on his phone. They waited for Changkyun until 10 in the evening only for the youngest to take a rain check at the last minute.

Hoseok chuckled as he proceeded to get a bigger glass by the kitchen counter for the chaser and pull out the cola from the refrigerator.

"Am I the only one who expected that?" Hoseok quipped as he settled the glasses and other bottles on the coffee table before dragging it closer to his bed.

"But we've planned this in advance, hyung. And he was pretty certain that he could come too, even until this afternoon," Kihyun whined with a pout while staring at the white ceiling of Hoseok's studio apartment.

The older glanced at the younger and thought it was adorable; how Kihyun easily becomes childish at times like these despite having an intimidating aura more often than not.

"So do you want to postpone this or?"

"Hell, no. I've been thinking about drinking since I got out from my last class earlier," Kihyun frowned.

"Take the first shot then."

 

More than half a bottle of whiskey and almost two liters of beer later, Kihyun was already feeling drunk than he would've liked to admit. The world was spinning, and his elbow couldn’t take the weight of his head anymore.

There was a comfortable silence in the room; clearly Hoseok has had enough alcohol in his system as well. There wasn’t much to talk about since Kihyun wasn’t in the mood to be serious; he wasn't a big fan of opening up to people. The younger truthfully just needed to unwind after a stressful week full of deadlines.

Somewhere along the way, Hoseok decided to turn on a rather chill playlist that he had prepared for the night, with the intention of letting Changkyun listen to it; knowing that the youngest likes listening to such music while drinking. 

Kihyun abruptly sat up straight from Hoseok's bed and looked at the older straight in the eyes, who was now leaning lazily against the wall with both legs propped up across him. The latter turned to him with raised eyebrows and waited for Kihyun to say something.

 _I can't explain something I don't understand  
__Why did I let this get out of hand-_ Not only was Kihyun getting bored, but he was also feeling braver than ever. Kihyun likes to blame it on the soft and sensual music playing in the background.

"I want to try giving someone a lap dance."

"What's with the sudden-"

Kihyun shifted shamelessly to straddle Hoseok with his thighs and snaked his arms around the older's shoulders, effectively closing the gap between them. And Hoseok for the life of him couldn’t figure out why he didn’t push the younger away, why he didn’t _want_ to push him away.

The cherry-haired man tilted his head with parted lips and hooded eyes. The mischief in Kihyun's eyes weren't that hard for Hoseok to miss. There was something about the way Kihyun wantonly eyed him down that it rendered him still. And it was only a matter of time before the younger started grinding against him, making sure to brush against the bulge that’s threatening to appear in Hoseok's pants. This caused Hoseok to let out a muted gasp and use the remaining strength in him to try and stop Kihyun by holding the younger's waist firmly on both sides. 

"What are you so afraid of?" and with a quiet whisper, Kihyun went straight for his lips.

Hoseok's breath hitched as he looked at the younger wide-eyed, not knowing what to do. But it didn’t take much from him before he finally allowed himself to let his eyelids fall, wrap his arms around Kihyun tighter, and slip his tongue in to return the sloppy kiss. 

 

Hoseok doesn’t know why. He doesn’t know why he had the urge to break away from the kiss and take the time to admire every detail on Kihyun's face, who looked like a beautiful panting mess on top of him. It's not like there were any feelings involved.

His eyes darted all over the younger's face, trying to take in everything that was in front of him. _Cute._ And Hoseok couldn’t help but break into a smile as he gently tucked away the messy strands of Kihyun's cherry hair behind his ears. This only earned him another teasing smile from the younger. 

There was chaos in Hoseok's mind. But whenever he immersed himself in the younger's warmth, he felt as if Kihyun was the one giving him peace despite doing the contrary. Hoseok liked to think that he has accepted this wasn't anything serious, yet his heart couldn't help but react to every smile that Kihyun flashed him in between open-mouthed kisses and wandering hands.

_Kihyun is enticingly beautiful._

Wasting no time, the younger eagerly leaned back in to capture Hoseok's plump lips once more, with a hand tightly gripping the fabric resting on the older's chest. Hoseok retaliated by slotting his hands at the back of Kihyun's thighs, successfully picking him up. A series of obscene and sinful moans escaped the younger's mouth as Hoseok effortlessly devoured him against the wall.

 

After what seemed to be ages of an intense make out session and grinding against each other on Hoseok's bed, Kihyun figured he had already spent his energy after all the moaning, touching, and neck-sucking that they did in every position possible. So with a heavy breath, the shorter wordlessly climbed off Hoseok and allowed himself to fall asleep, leaving the older in a daze.

It was only then that Hoseok truly realized how drunk Kihyun was. And he mentally slapped himself for getting too into it. As if it would change anything, Hoseok decided to keep the little dignity left in him and chose to sleep on the floor.

 

A little over an hour had passed before Hoseok was awakened by Kihyun, "Sorry for falling asleep."

"It's okay, what time is it?" Hoseok asked as he rubbed his eyes into focus.

"5 in the morning. Anyway, why the hell are you sleeping on the floor?" A tone of confusion evident in Kihyun's voice.

"I didn’t know whether you'd be comfortable with me sleeping beside you so…" Hoseok answered with downcast eyes.

"Hyung, we've already kissed and dry-humped each other. In your apartment. Just get up here," Kihyun deadpanned. And the older followed.

 

Two breaths.

"I'm sorry." Hoseok mumbled, sounding so genuine and afraid that he might have broken something. In this case, Kihyun's trust.

 "Why are you apologizing?" Kihyun replied while squinting his eyes and scrunching his nose, a habit that Hoseok observed whenever the younger was concentrating on trying to understand something.

"Because you were drunk, and I shouldn't have taken advantage of you in that state," Hoseok defended as he pushed his own black locks away from his forehead.

Unexpectedly, Kihyun _laughs_. Kihyun laughs that melodious laugh that Hoseok never thought could have that much effect on him, "I was the one who initiated it."

Kihyun looked entirely too amused that it took Hoseok a few more minutes before he finally gathered enough courage to ask the dreaded question that had been dancing around his mind while the younger was asleep.

"What now?"

Hoseok's heart suddenly went wild in his ribcage as soon as he finished uttering the question.

He supposes it was only because he needed to catch his breath. They were close friends. Close friends who occasionally became touchy with each other. It was their thing, and everyone else knew that. But perhaps the previous events awakened the suppressed feelings that the older himself was unaware of.

 

A pause.

"You don’t like me right?" Kihyun said so casually as he reached across Hoseok to take another sip from his bottle of stale beer resting on the table.

Hoseok didn’t know how to react. He might have felt his heart getting hit by a train if he paid attention enough. His friends had been asking him the same question time and time again, and he always had the same answer. Hoseok was sure every time he denied it. But when the same words slipped from the younger's mouth, all he could do was blink.

_What was I thinking?_

Calmly though unsure, Hoseok nodded silently, keeping his eyes trained on the other. Unconscious of how his own muscles tensed during their exchange.

"Well, I don’t like you in that way either. So I guess we're even," Kihyun shrugged before laughing once again.

 _That's foul play,_ Hoseok thinks as the younger beamed back at him with that devilish smile and same playful glint in his eyes. Because despite all that happened, Kihyun still looked like an angel to Hoseok—cheeks slightly tinted with a rosy color from the alcohol, complementing the soft cherry curls sitting atop the other's head as it sticks out in every direction, and exposed collarbones against pale skin with patches of purple beginning to bloom along the younger's neck.

It made Hoseok's heart flutter knowing that he was the one responsible for all of those things. And _God_ , was Kihyun glowing. He looked so soft and small, so perfect, underneath Hoseok's own breathless body—as if they were meant to be entangled in each other's arms like that in his small apartment ever since they first met.

 

As if hit by a sudden whirlwind of emotions, the older could no longer process anything that he was feeling. Part of him was itching to envelop Kihyun into a tight hug and tell him to stay, but a part of him also thinks—was trying to convince himself—that he's probably just confused. _Maybe it's the alcohol._

A few more heartbeats later, Hoseok decided that it wasn’t worth thinking about as long as the younger was still there in his arms. So Hoseok lets himself drown in Kihyun once again as the cherry-haired man pulled him in for another heated kiss.

But, maybe, at the back of his mind, Hoseok already knew for certain that he will never be the same once Kihyun leaves his place after sunrise.

So Hoseok tries to taste Kihyun like there's no tomorrow, because really, the pure bliss will be over soon.

**Author's Note:**

> uh i cant write smut can u tell
> 
> the song playing was [maybe](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DuAhRozlD3s) by alina baraz, no using a song for this fic was unintentional this time
> 
> ty for reading!


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